First Time Strapping

So you've never put on a harness before and it's something that interests you, or something you're willing to do for your ladyfriend's pleasure. If you're looking to strap it on for the first time, this is where you want to be. In Wild Hearts, the store, we try to address any and all questions about harnesses, so we're trying to re-format that for the site. If there's anything missing or you still have questions, don't hesitate to contact us.

There are different styles and materials in terms of harnesses. For this we're going to concentrate on the pelvic harness, but a lof of tips can be applied to any kind of harness. There are also a myriad of dildos to choose from, again in a variety of materials.

1. Pick one out. Our general recommendation is a leather harness if you're looking for a long-term one (and one that feels amazing against the skin), and a silicone dildo as they're virtually hypoallergenic, the longest-lasting, the only non-porous material for strapping on, and 100% silicone ones are phthalate-free.
2. Get to know your new toy by yourself. This may be a little harder if you and your lover(s) plan to switch who's wearing the strap-on, but try to each spend some time alone if this is everyone's first. Strap yourself into it, look at yourself in the mirror, maybe jack-off your dildo a bit.
3. Bring it into the bedroom at a good time. Make sure you have some time to play around with it and still do other things, too. Make sure you've got some water-based lube around, or some Pink (the only toy-safe silicone based lube). Even if neither partner has any trouble self-lubriacting most of the time a new experience can make a girl nervous, which doesn't lend itself to being well-prepared for a dildo. The lube suggestion is especially useful for anal sex, since the butt doesn't lubricate like the vagina does.!
4. Have your lover strap you into your harness. While it takes a minute or two the first time, it can be a good experience for both and can be really hot. Remember to make it more than the logistical buckling, this isn't a belt. Make it sexy.!
5. Be Safe(r) about it! If you're not using silicone or (even if you're using silicone) if you're switching partners or orifices on one partner your best friend is the condom. You can even color code them to differentiate between what goes or has been where on whom. !
6. Be prepared to LAUGH. Each time you try something new in bed it's probably going to get a little awkward. There's a lot of fumbling for all of us, particularly with something like a strap-on, which can take a good bit of experience to become talented with, so make sure you're open to a fun, laughter-filled roll in the hay! You won't look like a pornstar the first time (or you will, but from a made-for-straight-men woman-on-woman sex scene instead of a hot lesbian-made feminist pornstar)
7. Try out different things. As any guide for men who want to do well with ladies will tell you, it's not all about thrusting. The aim in strap-on sex, like all sex, is to have fun and have things feel good. Spend some time trying out different motions and positions. That's not to say there's any reason to refrain from finding your rhythm and thrusting your hips till your lover's in absolute extacy, but don't let that be added into the 'same thing, different night' category of sex. If you're both comfortable with it, bring some oral sex into the picture- it can be quite a good show for the person wearing the harness.
8. Disassemble and clean everything up. For silicone dildos soap and water is all you need, and they're best stored on-end (as in, with the flared base used to stand on, pointing vaguely upward). For other materials check out the materials sections for cleaning and care suggestions for your toy and harness!